markislav.c♥m

Why is it, that people have such a weird reaction to the name Markislav?

I mean, sure, I did actually just invent the name, adding -slav to my original name.

But still!

I usually get a reaction that is something similar to one of the following.

(All at work, I might add, after people read my badge.)

Most people don’t get how to pronounce it. Countless times, I have people come up and we have this conversation:

“Oh, how do you pronounce your name?”
“Markislav.”
“[Insert bad attempt at pronouncing simple name]”
“Markislav.”

Then usually, that conversation will be followed with:

“Thats interesting. Is it Croatian?”

Everybody always asks me if it’s Croatian. To save confusion, I always just tell them, “It’s Russian”.

They mostly always just tell me, “Thats very interesting”, and the conversation ends there.

Once or twice they’ve continued into “So you’re Russian?”, to which I reply with a very simple “Yes”, or “Yes, half-Russian, half-Australian.”

BUT!

Now this is the main reason I started writing this.

Some people have believed my name is just some sleazy attempt to pick up girls or something.

This one guy, who I work with, comes up to me, with which this conversation is had:

“What does your name badge say?”
“Markislav.”
“Markislav?”
“Yes, Markislav.”
“Is that like, Mark-is-love, or something?”
“No, it’s like Markislav, my name.”
“Aha…”

Cockbag.

Same thing went when someone, I can’t remember who, was on the phone to their father possibly, and I’m all like, “Tell him Markislav says HI!”, he told them “Mark says HI!”, and then I yelled, “NO! Markislav says HI!”, to which I hear loudly through the phone, “Alright! Mark-is-love, jesus, I get it.” It also sounded like he rolled his eyes at me, over the phone.

Assface.

Do I really seem that desperately sleazy that I would invent a name, that sounded kind of similar to “Mark-is-love” if you’re some ignorant westie Australian fuck who doesn’t get other cultures, as some incredibly sleazy, obviously “never-going-to-work”, way of picking up girls?

If I was anyway Slavic, in the slightest, I would be incredibly insulted if people thought that about my name.

Sure, I’m the only Markislav that has to worry about this, but what about other people in similar name situations?

What about all the Stanislavs?
All of the Tomislavs?
Vladislavs?
Miroslavs?
Borislavs?

I swear, as a tribute to my Slavic brothers and sisters, or seeing as I’m not Slavic in the slightest, cousins, whose parents have chosen to give their son or daughter the most precious gift of a name with the “-slav” suffix, which means “glory”, I will punch the next moronic uneducated bogan Australian fuck who thinks my name is nothing more than a sleazy pick up line.

Sure he’ll kick my ass, because I’m sure I’d fight like an 11 year old girl, but the principle of my actions will be there. Plus he’ll be drunker than I will be, and will have a long neck of VB which he would hit me with. Because that’s just what they carry with them all the time.

And thats pretty much it for my 3am ramblings about my name.

I haven’t had anything to drink, but I’m in a weird state of “was kind of sleeping on the lounge, just got up, feeling a bit stumble-y, more-so than when I’ve been drinking, now I have a weird woozy headache thing, and I ramble about shit”.

I might write something about that later.

so i was just driving home from work,

you know the intersection that is the street that goes by west ryde station, and meets victoria road?

well, i was turning right onto victoria road, with the rest of the traffic, green light for us.

so then! there was this stupid fucking moron learner driver driving at like 10km/h coming through the red light straight on victoria road.

i slam my breaks on, hold down my horn for like 2 minutes as this guy drives past me at his new speed of 3km/h, his speed nothing to do with me, just coz he was an absolute fucking retard. i’m beeping at him and screaming at him out my window, he completely just doesnt even see me, and proceeds to keep driving.

god fucking damn it people are fucking stupid!

RED FUCKING LIGHT!

there is absolutely no good reason why you could even miss that light!

its RED! colourblindness couldnt be a factor, seeing as its the top light!

and that was my afternoon !! learner drivers*, grr

You know how theres those people that make you say “Oh yeah, she sings pretty good.”

Then at the same time, there are those people that make you think: “Please give me a bat wrapped with barbed wire, and this girls address, so I can be the hero of every single person with ears”

Lil’ Mama, is the reason for the latter.

You may or may not have heard of her. The only reason I’ve listened to her, is because she’s recorded remixes of Avril’s Girlfriend, and Rihanna’s Umbrella.

I know there are some of you who are subscribed to receive my blog that would rather eat glass than listen to either of those songs, but, if you were to listen to the Lil’ Mama remixes, your preference of rather doing things would appear as:

1. Listen to original version of Umbrella.
2. Eat glass.
3. Listen to Lil’ Mama remix.

Ew.